I wonder

I wonder, what is it like being slim, because I have never been slim before. I wonder, what is it like being handsome, because I have never been handsome before. I wonder, what is it like being smart, because I have never been smart before.

And as I look at the stars high nigh in the heavens, and the trees standing for posterity, my troubles did seem trifle. Yet, what have I learnt today?

Sorrow has come to me, and it is welcoming, for I have missed it so. This nadir becomes me, and in achieving my ideals, the sadness becomes inevitable. Is this my fate? Should I continue? O Sadness, O Sorrow, let it wash over me, despite the little bits of happiness found around me, this inundation is my destiny. Is there no escaping my destiny, as my dreams become reality, in that oppressive place of work, where I have no illusions left, everything is ripped bare and stark for all to see, that the place is not the place for me.

He remains in that place, his yearning for another time, another place, remains elusive, rendering him frustrated, yet for all that is worth, he cannot leave. Another sad little fellow that seeks asylum in the traps of jokes that bear no trace of true happiness. Pitiable, yet deserving. He is the representation of all that is human; suffering to the ends of time, until the Lord claims him.

Xavier Harker is nigh.